Last Updated on November 12, 2017 by Memorila
In this Divorce Diary, a man divorced his devoted wife because of a second bird he aimed for in the forest, which turned out to ruin him and his family.
She told me that her parents were poor and they
could not afford kayan daki (women bedroom stuffs). I would have to sponsor the whole wedding. I said, “No wahala”! My lady shall not want for anything. So we started shopping for the kayan lefe (bridal clothes) and the kayan daki. Money was no object.
After months of shopping, I went to meet her uncles for introduction. I didn’t go with any of my friends because they hated Hafsa. I should have known something wasn’t right. Who receives only their in-law without any questions? Haba! They gave me a date. They asked me to return on that date. I had a bad feeling, but I couldn’t shake it. I asked Hafsa why they asked me to come on that date instead of giving me a date for daurin aure (wedding proper). She said it was their tradition.
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Two weeks later I heard from Hafsa’s friends that she was getting married to one Salihu guy. I dismissed them as envious tales. Hafsa told me she was going to Sokoto to see her aunt. She said she wanted to personally inform her of our wedding. Women are truly evil. Do you know I actually dropped her off at the airport? With a kiss!
After that I couldn’t reach her. For two days I tried unsuccessfully to reach her, I decided to call her uncle. I called him and he asked me to come and see him. I was confused and frustrated when he told me that Hafsa wanted me to divorce my wife first before the wedding. He said Hafsa would only switch her phone on if I divorced my wife before marrying her. I agreed. That night I sent Fatima packing out of my house. I picked a fight about Ummi’s toys being all over the house and divorced her. Early in the morning I went to her uncle to tell him the deed had been done. He called Hafsa and she said she was ready to be my wife.
It’s only now in hindsight that I realize how stupid and useless I was. This girl had turned me into a slave. When my waliyy (guardian) summoned me to explain why I had divorced my wife, I told him I was tired of her kuma na barta da Allah.I told him I couldn’t open my mouth to say the problems in my marriage that Fatima had done unspeakable things to me. He believed me.
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After a week, Hafsa was still not back from Sokoto. I was beginning to miss her. She said she would be back soon. Soon, two weeks became two months. I was agitated and becoming impatient. To make matters worse, her uncle had stopped picking my calls. Hafsa had switched off her line. I was at a loss as to what to do. So I called one of Hafsa’s friends and she confirmed my worst fear. Hafsa had gotten married to a commissioner in Sokoto!
It’s been a year since I last heard from Hafsa. I lost a lot of money and lost my family too. I always feel ashamed of myself whenever I go to see my daughter. Fatima always wondered why I divorced her. Worst of all, Fatima will remarry after Karamar Sallah.
I pray for forgiveness every day.
Thank you for sharing my #DivorceDiary. I hope you will not make my mistakes!
Next Series of Divorce Diary: Monday December 28, 2015
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